Posted by David
I couldn’t think of anything to blog about and it’s been a while, so I worked on this graphic. It explains my current state best.
I don’t feel at home with the conservatives. I don’t fit in with the liberals. I certainly don’t fit in with civilization. I feel best fit with the misfits and children out there, but even in their company I don’t connect all that well. I do feel at home in the wilderness, but I know it’s not my true home either. I do feel a familiarity which is akin to home with my family, but there too, like in the wilderness, it’s a fleeting home, rarely so comfortable that I’m at peace. I suppose one of the places that I feel most at home is closing my eyes and singing the gospels with other Christians, but that only happens regularly once a week. Again, like family and wilderness, it’s fleeting.
I will venture to guess that depression in all it’s forms is simply a manifestation of homesickness. If we’re not in some state of feeling homesick, we should ask why we’re not.
In my past I had a couple of bouts with what some might call depression, but that relentless deep empty feeling has not resurfaced in years, in particular since I realized that my home is outside the camp with Jesus.
Home is where the heart is and my heart is with Jesus.
And rising very early in the morning, while it was still dark, he departed and went out to a desolate place, and there he prayed.